Thursday, December 30, 2010

Blah Blah Blah.

(So devout, isn't she?  Barfing can do that to you.)

Talk about feeling off kilter today! 
Staying home too long with nothing to do drives me crazy!
Too many consecutive days with nothing to do drives me crazy!!

I think I've reached my limit.  [Not getting dressed for the day didn't help either.]  In fact, the 30 minutes of the day when I was dressed-- before dinner, because I couldn't take it anymore--were the most uplifting of the day.  Then, I went back to my sweats . . . but I DID leave on my earrings.  That's gotta count for something.

There were actually so many things I wanted to do today--like get my hair cut, go to the temple, write, finish reading my book--but none of them involved spending time with my family.  Guilt, guilt, guilt because how often do you get nearly two weeks of nonscheduled family time?  I said to Ben as we were lazying around, "Don't you have any dreams, anything you really want out of life, some great accomplishment?"  I hate his answer because it's always the same, "All I care about is that you guys are happy.  I don't need anything else."  Blah blah blah.  I can't decide if he's sincere or just not creative.  [Okay, I'm totally grateful he says that, but instantly I feel like a scum-bag because I could list off a gazillion other things I want out of life in addition to that.  I want to squeeze every. last. ounce. out of life.]

This is probably one of my gratitude-gone-to-the-wind days.  I've learned that about myself.  No gratitude = crappy day.  So, I'm grateful today that when Annie decided to throw up she came to me and said she needed a bowl 'cause she was "about to throw up."  Bowl in hand, barf in bowl.  Score.  Also, I've rediscovered my talent for Super Mario Brothers, on the wii.  Of course, in my day it was the Nintendo, but hey, if ya got it, ya got it, right?  Saving Princess Peach is still the goal.  All my old moves came back, not to mention totally scoring "cool mom" points with the kids.  I had an audience.  I was a celebrity in my own home.  Can't get much better than that, unless, of course, you think about it for a while.  THEN, you could probably come up with something better . . . .  Let's just say I chose to stop my thinking once I hit celebrity status.      

1 comment:

jenifer said...

i love you nettie... even though we are SO different. i think i could live the rest of my life in my pjs hangin' out at home. love it. but, i do love fun seeking friends who are always encouraging me to leave my cave. Hope you have a better day today... with trips out doors, and haircuts and writing and reading and all your dreams come true!!

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