Friday, September 17, 2010
Why trying to be cool doesn't pay . . .
If ya got, ya got it.
If ya don't, well, don't try.
And don't even think about scoring points with Cub Scouts.
They're never gonna think you're cool.
You're a mom. A has-been cool mom.
And when it comes to the Feats of Skill section, Achievement 1, well, I've heard that has-been cool moms shouldn't demonstrate the backward roll.
So I've heard.
And don't try to show off by prefacing your demonstration with, "When I was in gymnastics we always had to jump in the air with our hands above our heads before assuming the 'rolling position' and that would give us the momentum on the way down to push ourselves all the way over."
Just don't even say that.
Oh, and I've also heard that women with long hair should not leave their hair down while attempting said demonstration because it gets caught under their knees after they roll over and they can't lift their head because it's stuck. And then they scream because it hurts so bad, but the embarassment hurts even worse.
A two-fold scream.
So I've heard.
And one more thing. I've heard that whilst performing such a dangerous roll one can severely pull a muscle or pinch a nerve in her shoulder and neck that causes intense pain for DAYS afterwards. Some people even have to sleep with their faces in their mattresses, without a pillow, because every other position hurts.
But, I really wouldn't know. I've just heard those things can happen.
at 10:09 PM