I turned 33 today.
(FYI: while I'm typing this, Ben is doing the Insanity Workout. It sounds painful. He asked if I wanted to join him. I declined.)
I lay in bed this morning thinking that my mom was two years older than I am when she gave birth to me. Every so often I see my life in parallel with my mom's and it's weird to think that she was ever an unsure mother with little kids doing her best not to screw them up. I only knew The Mom that had it all together, probably because I'm the youngest.
Now that I've birthed my own wee babes, I don't think we ever have it all together or know all the answers, but with time the day-in-day-out routines become second nature, which may appear to kids as having it all together. I felt secure as a kid, knowing that if I forgot my lunch on the counter, Mom would stop by the school office later that morning, lunch in hand. Every week she gave herself a manicure. Every morning, before I was school-age, I'd watch her doing her hair and make-up. Honestly, I don't EVER remember her not doing her hair or putting on make-up. But what I learned from her wasn't about hair and make-up (heh, I have never used bright blue eye shadow). My mom was balanced. No extremes. She prioritized well, did what was needful, and still found time to trim her cuticles and paint her nails. She gave me a blueprint for a balanced life. Bless her.
I don't mind getting older. I actually like being in my 30's, except for the fact that it hurts to do a round-off, it's unsightly to attempt the splits, and, well, forget a back bend. Some things are better left in the 20's....
I'm excited when I think about the person I'm becoming. I'm growing and stretching. I'm learning to forget myself, to put others first. I'm developing my mind. I'm broadening my perspective. I'm feeling comfortable in my own skin, appreciating who I am, however flawed.
I must have a lot of growing up to do. I wasted so much time and energy in my teens and 20's worrying about body image, appearances. It's nice to let go of that stuff, or, rather, to put it in proper perspective. A beautiful mind is far more desirable than a pretty face. A meaningful conversation is way cooler than a good hair day. Sharing yourself, honestly, vulnerably, with another person is life-changing.
30's are good.