Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Who needs what?
I finally had a few minutes to myself this evening, sitting in the semi-darkness of a lamp-lit room (don't you love that kind of light at night?). My mind went to every person in my family and how all of their needs are different. I was a little overwhelmed that the majority of the responsibility for meeting those needs rests on my shoulders.
Ben needs a happy home. He needs to feel that we're all together. He needs encouragement that our present employment issues don't define our happiness as a family. That we'll be okay.
Brigham needs to feel that all of his hard work, every single day, is valued. That his efforts are good enough, even if he gets an answer wrong, or doesn't perform to his expectations. He needs to feel independence, that I trust him to make the "better" choice, on his own. He needs time with just me. Time to talk, even if he really doesn't have anything to say. He needs to know what's for breakfast tommorow:).
William. Sweet William. He needs to be loved, hugged, kissed, smiled at. He needs encouragement to stay on task. He needs moments of silliness and joking. He needs to be reminded to change his underwear every day and to keep his pee IN the toilet. He needs his intellect stretched and challenged.
Lincoln. Well, he needs a lot right now. He needs unconditional love. He needs a sweet tempered mother who is ever-so-patient. He needs kind words and lots of praise. He needs boundaries and limits. He needs physical activity, an indoor gym connected to our house would be beneficial. He needs to be heard and he needs his wild imagination to be appreciated and indulged.
Annie needs to feel a part of everyone else's life. She needs to follow me everywhere and do everything I'm doing. She needs to wipe herself--I'm not ready to give her that yet. Her needs are simple, really: love her, feed her, clothe her, nap beside her, and she's good to go.
When I look at all these needs, all needing to be met at the same time, I kind of go crazy inside wondering how I can do it all. But I'm wrong. I CAN'T do it all. That's what I'm learning over and over again. It's not just me. It's God, too. God gives me the know-how to juggle the neediness. How does that happen? I NEED to know:).
at 10:45 PM